It is the first time... someone approached me because a book I'm reading :))))
I was in the train... standing at a corner, obsessed with the book in my hand. Suddenly, this indian man in front of me came up and said,"Is this a psychological book you're reading?" I was a little taken aback but I do appreciate these observant people around... I noticed a few strangers slightly curious about this book I was reading. It's named Destructive Emotions: And how we can overcome them. I found it in the library, and it was a real-life experiment the scientists had with a Dalai Lama, and they have started to study positive emotions in psychology recently. So now you know they have been focusing too much on the negative ones in the past! It is actually a study between Buddhism and Science. Interesting, isn't it?? It's very thick, so I'm still stuck in the early chapters....
30.7.06
29.7.06
ich liebe der Pirat
Yes, the long awaited movie... Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
A lot of my friends say they like the first film better... I didn't see why I didn't like the second one better. The first of any film is always intriguing because you're curious about anything, everything. And the second always is a bridge across to the third or any succeeding films. I find Dead Man's Chest a lot more entertaining (humour!), interesting (I like that ship that submerges and does evil-cracking-monster), mysterious (ending!), and I like the fact that we get to see Will Turner's father. And of course the usual, my favourite character - Jack Sparrow!
A lot of my friends say they like the first film better... I didn't see why I didn't like the second one better. The first of any film is always intriguing because you're curious about anything, everything. And the second always is a bridge across to the third or any succeeding films. I find Dead Man's Chest a lot more entertaining (humour!), interesting (I like that ship that submerges and does evil-cracking-monster), mysterious (ending!), and I like the fact that we get to see Will Turner's father. And of course the usual, my favourite character - Jack Sparrow!
28.7.06
One down, another one left
My professional life is a bit "sucky" (there isn't a term but well it means "sucks").
My first full-time job in Singapore since my return is warming me up for a lot of future challenges, somehow I am prepared. I don't think it is the right place for me to stay. I've been facing a lot of obstacles and I need to overcome them before that something right comes along. Facing with finding my passion and goal, working with difficult people and handling a new, raw and disorganized project... so far it has not only taught me a lot of tolerance and patience, but today I finally resolved a work problem.
If you remember my past entry about an incompetent person, this afternoon I finally exploded. Not a fiery eruption, actually a mild but serious one. I have gathered my courage, collected my evidence, and walked up to this person. I told him I needed to talk to him and I listed all the things I was very unhappy about when he worked with me.
Surprisingly, he did not defend any or most of the things I have said. It seemed like he agreed he was at fault or well, is he just putting up a nice front and wear a mask in front of me? I don't know. The funny thing is that he wanted to keep that piece of paper where I listed the incidents. I sillily gave it to him, but later on I changed my mind and trashed it! I handled it the professional way - I'd like to reckon. There wasn't any bad air after the confrontation, well, at least I think so too!
My designer-colleagues were stunned by my upfrontness and courage, I guess a lot of us Asians do not speak up a lot so we ended up frustrated about things at work. Bury, bury, bury; accumulate, accumulate, accumulate; store store, store... and where is all these shit going to come out from??? I don't like the idea of venting the frustration on some innocent party! Now I'm beginning to see that work life should not be affecting my personal life!!!
So it's one down... Next, finding my passion :))))))))))))))
My first full-time job in Singapore since my return is warming me up for a lot of future challenges, somehow I am prepared. I don't think it is the right place for me to stay. I've been facing a lot of obstacles and I need to overcome them before that something right comes along. Facing with finding my passion and goal, working with difficult people and handling a new, raw and disorganized project... so far it has not only taught me a lot of tolerance and patience, but today I finally resolved a work problem.
If you remember my past entry about an incompetent person, this afternoon I finally exploded. Not a fiery eruption, actually a mild but serious one. I have gathered my courage, collected my evidence, and walked up to this person. I told him I needed to talk to him and I listed all the things I was very unhappy about when he worked with me.
Surprisingly, he did not defend any or most of the things I have said. It seemed like he agreed he was at fault or well, is he just putting up a nice front and wear a mask in front of me? I don't know. The funny thing is that he wanted to keep that piece of paper where I listed the incidents. I sillily gave it to him, but later on I changed my mind and trashed it! I handled it the professional way - I'd like to reckon. There wasn't any bad air after the confrontation, well, at least I think so too!
My designer-colleagues were stunned by my upfrontness and courage, I guess a lot of us Asians do not speak up a lot so we ended up frustrated about things at work. Bury, bury, bury; accumulate, accumulate, accumulate; store store, store... and where is all these shit going to come out from??? I don't like the idea of venting the frustration on some innocent party! Now I'm beginning to see that work life should not be affecting my personal life!!!
So it's one down... Next, finding my passion :))))))))))))))
23.7.06
That once in a blue moon shopping mood
The time has come.
Not too sure if it's an accumulation of the stress and unhappiness I've had earlier the week at work, now I need some retail therapy. The Great Singapore Sale ends this weekend, and so far I have not really gone on a shopping spree except for things that I needed.
Like when I have to throw a pair of shoes, usually I get a similar substitute because it's something I'm so used to wearing it so often. So I bought a pair of "ballet" alike shoes, which is silver and quite comfortable (I hope it doesn't hurt). And most importantly, it's FLAT!!! I actually spotted one in ALDO, but sadly the last pair was 4 sizes bigger! ARghh....
Also I bought myself a Happy Meal today, not to make myself happier but my colleagues have started this Happy Meal toy collection thing going in the office. I'm tempted, it's the set of the Ronald Mc Donald guys with their "shaky" heads. But the Happy Meal seems healthier than the normal set meals, because we can have salad, corns, fruits and yoghurt instead and no compulsory choice of soft drink!! 3 more to come :))) I still remember I had Happy Meal when I was back in London or Germany, I'm quite a big kid I suppose.
A pokka dots blue spagetti and a "dotty" laced white skirt. My rewards for the day. I'm quite pleased with the purchase because it only costs me $50 for everything plus my Happy Meal. Much cheaper than shopping in europe I guess...
Talking about this... I've made myself a bag from a fancy tee that I bought in Thailand which couldn't fit me. I like arts & craft. Here's a picture of my creation... not sure what I should name it. Maybe I can make such bags and sell? Hand-made!!
Not too sure if it's an accumulation of the stress and unhappiness I've had earlier the week at work, now I need some retail therapy. The Great Singapore Sale ends this weekend, and so far I have not really gone on a shopping spree except for things that I needed.
Like when I have to throw a pair of shoes, usually I get a similar substitute because it's something I'm so used to wearing it so often. So I bought a pair of "ballet" alike shoes, which is silver and quite comfortable (I hope it doesn't hurt). And most importantly, it's FLAT!!! I actually spotted one in ALDO, but sadly the last pair was 4 sizes bigger! ARghh....
Also I bought myself a Happy Meal today, not to make myself happier but my colleagues have started this Happy Meal toy collection thing going in the office. I'm tempted, it's the set of the Ronald Mc Donald guys with their "shaky" heads. But the Happy Meal seems healthier than the normal set meals, because we can have salad, corns, fruits and yoghurt instead and no compulsory choice of soft drink!! 3 more to come :))) I still remember I had Happy Meal when I was back in London or Germany, I'm quite a big kid I suppose.
A pokka dots blue spagetti and a "dotty" laced white skirt. My rewards for the day. I'm quite pleased with the purchase because it only costs me $50 for everything plus my Happy Meal. Much cheaper than shopping in europe I guess...
Talking about this... I've made myself a bag from a fancy tee that I bought in Thailand which couldn't fit me. I like arts & craft. Here's a picture of my creation... not sure what I should name it. Maybe I can make such bags and sell? Hand-made!!
21.7.06
2 songs: For whom I loved & whom I detest
Here's a song that constantly rings in my head... sang by a chinese singer, its called "How could you let me be upset" (translated by me of course). The lyrics just appeared from nowhere whenever I felt upset and I found myself humming along to this song. And it also perfectly describes the scenario...
你怎麼捨得我難過 - 黃品源
對你的思念是一天又一天
孤單的我還是沒有改變
美麗的夢何時才能出現
親愛的你好想再見你一面
秋天的風一陣陣的吹過
想起了去年的這個時候
你的心到底在想些甚麼
為甚麼留下這個結局讓我承受
最愛你的人是我 你怎麼捨得我難過
在我最需要你的時候 沒有說一句話就走
最愛你的人是我 你怎麼捨得我難過
對你付出了這麼多 你卻沒有感動過
Here's another song that I've modified from the above song to describe my feelings to someone I really detest at work!!! It's called "Why do you make my life so hard to go by". Does it sound any good to you??
你使我日子很難過 - 我
對着你工作痛苦的每一天
可怜的我還是沒有选择
快乐时光何時才会出現
无奈的我好想给你个耳光
每天对着你真的好难过
想起昨日在车上的時候
你的嘴到底何时能闭上
為甚麼给我留下這噩梦的回忆
最憎恨的人是你 我怎麼捨得你快乐
在我最厌倦你的時候 我会让你更加痛苦
最憎恨的人是你 我怎麼捨得你快乐
對你臭骂了這麼多 你卻沒有清醒過
你怎麼捨得我難過 - 黃品源
對你的思念是一天又一天
孤單的我還是沒有改變
美麗的夢何時才能出現
親愛的你好想再見你一面
秋天的風一陣陣的吹過
想起了去年的這個時候
你的心到底在想些甚麼
為甚麼留下這個結局讓我承受
最愛你的人是我 你怎麼捨得我難過
在我最需要你的時候 沒有說一句話就走
最愛你的人是我 你怎麼捨得我難過
對你付出了這麼多 你卻沒有感動過
Here's another song that I've modified from the above song to describe my feelings to someone I really detest at work!!! It's called "Why do you make my life so hard to go by". Does it sound any good to you??
你使我日子很難過 - 我
對着你工作痛苦的每一天
可怜的我還是沒有选择
快乐时光何時才会出現
无奈的我好想给你个耳光
每天对着你真的好难过
想起昨日在车上的時候
你的嘴到底何时能闭上
為甚麼给我留下這噩梦的回忆
最憎恨的人是你 我怎麼捨得你快乐
在我最厌倦你的時候 我会让你更加痛苦
最憎恨的人是你 我怎麼捨得你快乐
對你臭骂了這麼多 你卻沒有清醒過
There's no such thing as a job
I want to quote this sentence from a guy named Scott who said,".... to me this all seems like I'm getting paid just to do my hobby."
19.7.06
My beloved, it's gone :(((((((((
My dearest, most cherished shoes is torn :"(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
It's snow white, with a little flower on each. Soft. Comfortable. Like a pair of ballet shoes, I can almost dance on its tip. Yet, after being with me for almost 2 years, it has finally reached the end of its very short life. I brought them with me to London, it was the one I wore most, even to the backpacking trips I had it with me. I've been searching high and low for an identical one but couldn't find any... As it tears as the days goes by, it really hurts to see. First the sole was gone, so I replaced it with the soles of my old Adidas (also my favourite pair of Adidas shoes which I had to leave behind in London after meeting its end). I see its surface so crumpled and wrinkled, yet I didn't expect today would be its last day :(((( A hole on the right pair has given my toe a little breathing space!! *sobs*
It's snow white, with a little flower on each. Soft. Comfortable. Like a pair of ballet shoes, I can almost dance on its tip. Yet, after being with me for almost 2 years, it has finally reached the end of its very short life. I brought them with me to London, it was the one I wore most, even to the backpacking trips I had it with me. I've been searching high and low for an identical one but couldn't find any... As it tears as the days goes by, it really hurts to see. First the sole was gone, so I replaced it with the soles of my old Adidas (also my favourite pair of Adidas shoes which I had to leave behind in London after meeting its end). I see its surface so crumpled and wrinkled, yet I didn't expect today would be its last day :(((( A hole on the right pair has given my toe a little breathing space!! *sobs*
17.7.06
Model parent??
I saw two incidents... which really makes me wonder what kind of parent I'll become when I do have kids!
Incident one. In the train, a family of four sat opposite me. The dad was with the older daughter, while the mum was with the younger. There was no problem with the older kid but the younger one was getting unsettled, grouchy and could never keep still. She seemed like a little pampered grumpy princess. Guess what her mummy did???
No... not slap her, scold her nor gave her a stern stare. She carried her on her shoulder, tried to coax her to sleep... gave her a warm hug and kiss on her forehead. At that instant, I felt what seemed like a kick in my face, teaching kids is not about being harsh. It is no longer about screaming and running after them with cane or feather duster. Everyone needs love, so do the little children at such a young age! How my parents have disciplined me does not mean I'll have to do the same way to my kids...
Incident two. I have just returned from work, at the lift lobby I saw this little girl giving a shout to her daddy before she ran up the stairs. Her dad was going to take the lift, while she did the climbing. I got into the same lift with her dad and when we exited at the 6th storey I saw the little girl panting as she made her way up to the 6th. As I looked on, I saw her doting daddy held his hand out to her and called,"Come... Tired already??" (I think those are what he said) The daddy held his little girl's hand and they walked back to their flat. As a stranger, I felt their love... I felt that fatherly love I never seem to have. I was touched for quite a while and often wish my parents were so loving to us...
Incident one. In the train, a family of four sat opposite me. The dad was with the older daughter, while the mum was with the younger. There was no problem with the older kid but the younger one was getting unsettled, grouchy and could never keep still. She seemed like a little pampered grumpy princess. Guess what her mummy did???
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
No... not slap her, scold her nor gave her a stern stare. She carried her on her shoulder, tried to coax her to sleep... gave her a warm hug and kiss on her forehead. At that instant, I felt what seemed like a kick in my face, teaching kids is not about being harsh. It is no longer about screaming and running after them with cane or feather duster. Everyone needs love, so do the little children at such a young age! How my parents have disciplined me does not mean I'll have to do the same way to my kids...
Incident two. I have just returned from work, at the lift lobby I saw this little girl giving a shout to her daddy before she ran up the stairs. Her dad was going to take the lift, while she did the climbing. I got into the same lift with her dad and when we exited at the 6th storey I saw the little girl panting as she made her way up to the 6th. As I looked on, I saw her doting daddy held his hand out to her and called,"Come... Tired already??" (I think those are what he said) The daddy held his little girl's hand and they walked back to their flat. As a stranger, I felt their love... I felt that fatherly love I never seem to have. I was touched for quite a while and often wish my parents were so loving to us...
Either has to go... you or me!
What do you do when you work with someone less competent than you??
Try to be patient. Try to teach. Try to guide. Try to be tactful. Arrggghhh, I'm losing my patience... losing my head... Many times I try to overlook, but it has happened again, again and again. In fact it happens all the time, every single day!!! I don't understand why he's so slow, so blur, so inefficient, so incompetent, always making mistakes, asking silly questions and more importantly getting on my nerves. He really is STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID, not that I'm trying to be mean, but time has proved it. Oh god, if only you could grant me more kindness and give him more brain cells!!!
Try to be patient. Try to teach. Try to guide. Try to be tactful. Arrggghhh, I'm losing my patience... losing my head... Many times I try to overlook, but it has happened again, again and again. In fact it happens all the time, every single day!!! I don't understand why he's so slow, so blur, so inefficient, so incompetent, always making mistakes, asking silly questions and more importantly getting on my nerves. He really is STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID, not that I'm trying to be mean, but time has proved it. Oh god, if only you could grant me more kindness and give him more brain cells!!!
15.7.06
Hehehehee...
I smiled at May & Choy today... yes, the MTV twins... and they smiled at me too :)))))) We were at the STOMP event at Plaza Singapura with lots of free food *yummm...*
14.7.06
Still not enough free time!
Finally an off day from work. BUT BUT BUT I will work on the coming Sunday!! Fortunately it's only half a day but I hate commuting during the weekend, really hate hate hate the crowds!!! Sibei sianz one leh!
Coming back from a swim, I was walking home when I heard someone called my name! "Trixy!" I saw this uncle, he indeed looked very familiar. Oh yes, it was someone from my vacation job at SIA engineering company. Man, it was all in 1998, how can he possibly remember my face and surprisingly enough, my name! I didn't know I did leave an impression back then??? I think he's about twice my age, he aged quite a bit... c'mon its been 8 years!!
We were having a short conversation when all of a sudden it switched to Christianity, from blood donating! He told me of some incidents happened to the people at the office (the boss which I worked as a secretary for) and his dad. They have accepted Christ and He has helped them! Well, though I'm not devoted to any religion, I do believe in God, I guess that's what that matters to me.
p/s: Somehow I didn't feel so strong anymore when I swim, when I was in the deeper pool I felt I had the power to overcome drowning. But now I feel so much weaker, not sure if it's because I didn't have a proper meal or that a drowning incident does affect it.
Coming back from a swim, I was walking home when I heard someone called my name! "Trixy!" I saw this uncle, he indeed looked very familiar. Oh yes, it was someone from my vacation job at SIA engineering company. Man, it was all in 1998, how can he possibly remember my face and surprisingly enough, my name! I didn't know I did leave an impression back then??? I think he's about twice my age, he aged quite a bit... c'mon its been 8 years!!
We were having a short conversation when all of a sudden it switched to Christianity, from blood donating! He told me of some incidents happened to the people at the office (the boss which I worked as a secretary for) and his dad. They have accepted Christ and He has helped them! Well, though I'm not devoted to any religion, I do believe in God, I guess that's what that matters to me.
p/s: Somehow I didn't feel so strong anymore when I swim, when I was in the deeper pool I felt I had the power to overcome drowning. But now I feel so much weaker, not sure if it's because I didn't have a proper meal or that a drowning incident does affect it.
13.7.06
I'm not a superwoman...
but maybe I can be one...
Recalling yesterday, I was running with my heels down a flight of stairs just to catch the bus, luckily the bus didn't drive off... It's been a while since I wore heels, I have been favoring the flats more. But my thoughts have been drifting away, everytime the door is closing, I realized I've already reached my destination. Like today in the MRT, like yesterday on the bus!! So I ended up alighting without tapping my Ez-link at the exit, because I anxiously ran down. I hate this stupid system, where you pay the maximum fare and get the rest refunded when you alight. Why can't they learn from London bus that we pay a fixed amount of fare!! Old people forget, anxious people like me forget... So I thought I'd check it out how I can get a refund at the ticket sales office. It ended up that I can only collect the pathetic 40cents back with the receipt a week later at any sales office. How silly, only 40 cents, takes a week?? Forget it lah hor... Well, if I do remember and if I do have the receipt... Should I write in to them that they should really improve their system!
For the last 4 months, I rarely bumped into my neighbour, this Honkie-British old couple... Till the day before, I happened to see them at the lift lobby. Since my holidaymaking in London, my neighbour auntie has been encouraging me to stay on in UK and suggests lots of ways I could stay there. I wish it is that easy! Can I give up my passport for theirs??
My life is getting routine and I seriously detest it... Work, eat and sleep. Basically, that's all I do. Finishing work, I get home around 12am or before if I'm luckier... Sleep around 3am (if I do manage a hair wash) or some TV (fortunately World Cup ended)... it means I get more beauty sleep. Woke up at 11am, not much time left after a breakfast and shower, then I need to prepare to leave for work at 1pm. Tabulek tahan!!! I don't even find the decent time to paint my nails, think about my long-termed career - I need that!
I dream every night... I wonder if all my creative cells have been resting too much at work and they all worked throughout my sleep! There is no need for my creative juice to flow at work, so sad... luckily they aren't dying, they just changed their shift to work the later night shift :S The night before I dreamt about Emperor and fruits (a buffet)... don't ask me why, maybe watched too much Korea serial the last time round. Last night, I actually dreamt I met up with Dan. A friend I have known online since I was 16... 8 years now, we lost contact and got back in touch. It's funny that we are so near yet very far at the same time. He was like a brother to me, though now we're not as close as before... He lives some bus-stops away from my workplace, but we just have not decided to meet. The later part of the dream was horrible because I met a pervert... there's no one around to help me :((((((((((
Recalling yesterday, I was running with my heels down a flight of stairs just to catch the bus, luckily the bus didn't drive off... It's been a while since I wore heels, I have been favoring the flats more. But my thoughts have been drifting away, everytime the door is closing, I realized I've already reached my destination. Like today in the MRT, like yesterday on the bus!! So I ended up alighting without tapping my Ez-link at the exit, because I anxiously ran down. I hate this stupid system, where you pay the maximum fare and get the rest refunded when you alight. Why can't they learn from London bus that we pay a fixed amount of fare!! Old people forget, anxious people like me forget... So I thought I'd check it out how I can get a refund at the ticket sales office. It ended up that I can only collect the pathetic 40cents back with the receipt a week later at any sales office. How silly, only 40 cents, takes a week?? Forget it lah hor... Well, if I do remember and if I do have the receipt... Should I write in to them that they should really improve their system!
For the last 4 months, I rarely bumped into my neighbour, this Honkie-British old couple... Till the day before, I happened to see them at the lift lobby. Since my holidaymaking in London, my neighbour auntie has been encouraging me to stay on in UK and suggests lots of ways I could stay there. I wish it is that easy! Can I give up my passport for theirs??
My life is getting routine and I seriously detest it... Work, eat and sleep. Basically, that's all I do. Finishing work, I get home around 12am or before if I'm luckier... Sleep around 3am (if I do manage a hair wash) or some TV (fortunately World Cup ended)... it means I get more beauty sleep. Woke up at 11am, not much time left after a breakfast and shower, then I need to prepare to leave for work at 1pm. Tabulek tahan!!! I don't even find the decent time to paint my nails, think about my long-termed career - I need that!
I dream every night... I wonder if all my creative cells have been resting too much at work and they all worked throughout my sleep! There is no need for my creative juice to flow at work, so sad... luckily they aren't dying, they just changed their shift to work the later night shift :S The night before I dreamt about Emperor and fruits (a buffet)... don't ask me why, maybe watched too much Korea serial the last time round. Last night, I actually dreamt I met up with Dan. A friend I have known online since I was 16... 8 years now, we lost contact and got back in touch. It's funny that we are so near yet very far at the same time. He was like a brother to me, though now we're not as close as before... He lives some bus-stops away from my workplace, but we just have not decided to meet. The later part of the dream was horrible because I met a pervert... there's no one around to help me :((((((((((
Early in the morning
I put breakfast at your table
And make sure that your coffee
Has its sugar and cream
Your eggs are over easy
Your toast done lightly
All that's missing is your morning kiss
That used to greet me
Now you say the juice is sour
It used to be so sweet
And I can't help but to wonder
If you're talking 'bout me
We don't talk the way we used to talk
It's hurtin' so deep
I've got my pride, I will not cry
But it's makin' me weak
*I'm not your superwoman
I'm not the kind of girl that you can let down
And think that everything's okay
Boy, I am only human
This girl needs more than occasional
Hugs as a token of love from you to me, ooh, baby*
I fought my way through the rush hour
Trying to make it home just for you
I want to make sure that your dinner
Will be waiting for you
But when you get there you just tell me
You're not hungry at all
You said you'd rather read the paper
And you don't want to talk
You like to think that I'm just crazy
When I say that you changed
I'm convinced I know the problem
You don't love me the same
You're just going through the motions
And you're not being fair
I've got my pride, I will not cry
Still I can't help but care
*chorus* x 2
Oh, baby, look into the corners of your mind
I'll always be there for you through good and bad times
But I can't be that superwoman that you want me to be
I'll give my everlasting love if you'll return love to me
*chorus*
If you feel it in your heart
And you understand me
Stop right where you are
Everybody sing along with me
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
I'm the kind of girl that can treat you so sweet
But you got to realize that you got to be sweeter to me, oh, ho, ho
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
I need love
I need just your love
*chorus*
I'm not your superwoman
I put breakfast at your table
And make sure that your coffee
Has its sugar and cream
Your eggs are over easy
Your toast done lightly
All that's missing is your morning kiss
That used to greet me
Now you say the juice is sour
It used to be so sweet
And I can't help but to wonder
If you're talking 'bout me
We don't talk the way we used to talk
It's hurtin' so deep
I've got my pride, I will not cry
But it's makin' me weak
*I'm not your superwoman
I'm not the kind of girl that you can let down
And think that everything's okay
Boy, I am only human
This girl needs more than occasional
Hugs as a token of love from you to me, ooh, baby*
I fought my way through the rush hour
Trying to make it home just for you
I want to make sure that your dinner
Will be waiting for you
But when you get there you just tell me
You're not hungry at all
You said you'd rather read the paper
And you don't want to talk
You like to think that I'm just crazy
When I say that you changed
I'm convinced I know the problem
You don't love me the same
You're just going through the motions
And you're not being fair
I've got my pride, I will not cry
Still I can't help but care
*chorus* x 2
Oh, baby, look into the corners of your mind
I'll always be there for you through good and bad times
But I can't be that superwoman that you want me to be
I'll give my everlasting love if you'll return love to me
*chorus*
If you feel it in your heart
And you understand me
Stop right where you are
Everybody sing along with me
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
I'm the kind of girl that can treat you so sweet
But you got to realize that you got to be sweeter to me, oh, ho, ho
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
Hoo, hoo, hoo, ooh, ooh, hoo
I need love
I need just your love
*chorus*
I'm not your superwoman
A song that perfectly describes my feelings...
11.7.06
Another dream :S
I always have multiple-in-one dream!! Why???
I slept at 330am last night ,or actually, it's today! I have 2 vivid scenes in my dream I can still recall very clearly.
Scene 1
I was with a group of people, couldn't remember if they were my friends but we were pretty friendly to each other so should be somehow. Then there was this big massive swimming pool, it was sort of like an amusement pool... because I remember it being so huge and there was this side for us to dive, its 4.95 METRES DEEP!!! Gosh!!! The other end is much shallower, and when you dive down, you get washed with the currents and like a slide, it brings you to the shallow end. I am not a superb swimmer and I always have this fear of drowning or jumping into a deep pool where I couldn't touch my feet on the ground. I get freaked out! So in the dream, I was rather afraid to jump! At the end, I was given a float (like those board when you learnt swimming)... and I jumped!! I can still recall that moment I sank into the water, that vision so clearly... like slow motion video... replaying in my mind! And when I managed to surface, I felt so good and relieved and very quickly was washed away with the currents. Very fun!
Dream Analysis:
Swimming Pool
To see a swimming pool full of water in your dream is lucky, symbolizing that you will find much happiness and pleasure in friendship, love and marriage.
To dream that you are swimming, suggests that you are exploring aspects of your unconscious mind and emotions. The dream may be a sign that you are seeking some sort of emotional support. It is a common dream image for people going through therapy.
To dream that you are swimming underwater, suggests that you are completely submerged in your own feelings. You are forcing yourself to deal with your emotional difficulties.
Diving
Diving in a dream suggests that you are trying to "get to the bottom" of a current situation or feeling. It also signifies exploring the unconscious.
To dream that you are diving into clear water, signifies an end to an embarrassing situation. Although you may experience some temporary setbacks, things will surely look up. Additionally, this dream may mean that you are trying to get to the bottom of a current situation and the root of your problems or feelings. It may also refer exploration of your unconscious.
Scene 2
This one is rather private and personal... I think I shall censor most of it. But it was with someone it shouldn't have been... and there were really confused and mixed feelings going on there. I felt an obligation to help him. No analysis on this one, I'm afraid... :(((
I slept at 330am last night ,or actually, it's today! I have 2 vivid scenes in my dream I can still recall very clearly.
Scene 1
I was with a group of people, couldn't remember if they were my friends but we were pretty friendly to each other so should be somehow. Then there was this big massive swimming pool, it was sort of like an amusement pool... because I remember it being so huge and there was this side for us to dive, its 4.95 METRES DEEP!!! Gosh!!! The other end is much shallower, and when you dive down, you get washed with the currents and like a slide, it brings you to the shallow end. I am not a superb swimmer and I always have this fear of drowning or jumping into a deep pool where I couldn't touch my feet on the ground. I get freaked out! So in the dream, I was rather afraid to jump! At the end, I was given a float (like those board when you learnt swimming)... and I jumped!! I can still recall that moment I sank into the water, that vision so clearly... like slow motion video... replaying in my mind! And when I managed to surface, I felt so good and relieved and very quickly was washed away with the currents. Very fun!
Dream Analysis:
Swimming Pool
To see a swimming pool full of water in your dream is lucky, symbolizing that you will find much happiness and pleasure in friendship, love and marriage.
To dream that you are swimming, suggests that you are exploring aspects of your unconscious mind and emotions. The dream may be a sign that you are seeking some sort of emotional support. It is a common dream image for people going through therapy.
To dream that you are swimming underwater, suggests that you are completely submerged in your own feelings. You are forcing yourself to deal with your emotional difficulties.
Diving
Diving in a dream suggests that you are trying to "get to the bottom" of a current situation or feeling. It also signifies exploring the unconscious.
To dream that you are diving into clear water, signifies an end to an embarrassing situation. Although you may experience some temporary setbacks, things will surely look up. Additionally, this dream may mean that you are trying to get to the bottom of a current situation and the root of your problems or feelings. It may also refer exploration of your unconscious.
Scene 2
This one is rather private and personal... I think I shall censor most of it. But it was with someone it shouldn't have been... and there were really confused and mixed feelings going on there. I felt an obligation to help him. No analysis on this one, I'm afraid... :(((
10.7.06
Oh Zizou, how can?
That‘s the headline on The New Paper today!
Italy won, I think beautifully because I read they have never won on penalty shoot-out (not sure how accurate this is). They got 5 lovely goals in, however I do have a dislike for their Goalkeeper - Buffon! I put my money on Italy, however it was a shame they only had a DRAW at full-time, so I still didn't get to win. But, but, I am very happy France didn't win, so that little bet did go somewhere!
My sisters bet on France, it's a shame!
Zidane actually surprised us by doing a "铁头功" on his opponent... Errmmm, in case you can't read Chinese/Mandarin, its the "metal head kungfu" (Iiterally translated). Why did he do that??? On his last international match, in his last World Cup, and with the almost definite possibility of receiving a RED card and asked to leave the match. He has done it, and that shall be a memorable record in the World Cup history. Even though no one really knows what exactly happened, what did Materazzi said to him??? I'm curious...
Captain Cannavaro didn't disappoint me at all ;))) He's quite a perky little thing despite him being shorter than most players... Very fit, I like it. Heheh... Enough of drooling at these italian men, yes, Italy won World Cup 2006 in Berlin on 9th July 2006!!
Italy won, I think beautifully because I read they have never won on penalty shoot-out (not sure how accurate this is). They got 5 lovely goals in, however I do have a dislike for their Goalkeeper - Buffon! I put my money on Italy, however it was a shame they only had a DRAW at full-time, so I still didn't get to win. But, but, I am very happy France didn't win, so that little bet did go somewhere!
My sisters bet on France, it's a shame!
Zidane actually surprised us by doing a "铁头功" on his opponent... Errmmm, in case you can't read Chinese/Mandarin, its the "metal head kungfu" (Iiterally translated). Why did he do that??? On his last international match, in his last World Cup, and with the almost definite possibility of receiving a RED card and asked to leave the match. He has done it, and that shall be a memorable record in the World Cup history. Even though no one really knows what exactly happened, what did Materazzi said to him??? I'm curious...
Captain Cannavaro didn't disappoint me at all ;))) He's quite a perky little thing despite him being shorter than most players... Very fit, I like it. Heheh... Enough of drooling at these italian men, yes, Italy won World Cup 2006 in Berlin on 9th July 2006!!
Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!! Woohoo!!!
7.7.06
Just for fun, you might want to try this!
Not that I'm particularly keen in dating at the moment, but it's a little fun test (got it through a friend's blog entry) :)
Your dating personality profile:
Liberal - Politics matters to you, and you aren't afraid to share your left-leaning views. You would never be caught voting for a conservative candidate.
Adventurous - Just sitting around the house is not something that appeals to you. You love to be out trying new things and really experiencing life.
Big-Hearted - You are a kind and caring person. Your warmth is inviting, and your heart is a wellspring of love.
Your Top 10 Traits
1. Liberal
2. Adventurous
3. Big-Hearted
4. Athletic
5. Sensual
6. Practical
7. Intellectual
8. Outgoing
9. Stylish
10. Wealthy/Ambitious
Your date match profile:
Big-Hearted - You want someone compassionate, someone gentle and kind. A loving, nurturing person will fill that hole in your life.
Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living.
Adventurous - You are looking for someone who is willing to try new things and experience life to its fullest. You need a companion who encourages you to take risks and do exciting things.
Your Top 10 Match Traits
1. Big-Hearted
2. Practical
3. Adventurous
4. Athletic
5. Outgoing
6. Conservative
7. Intellectual
8. Sensual
9. Wealthy/Ambitious
10. Stylish
Take the Online Dating Profile Quiz at Dating Diversions
Your dating personality profile:
Liberal - Politics matters to you, and you aren't afraid to share your left-leaning views. You would never be caught voting for a conservative candidate.
Adventurous - Just sitting around the house is not something that appeals to you. You love to be out trying new things and really experiencing life.
Big-Hearted - You are a kind and caring person. Your warmth is inviting, and your heart is a wellspring of love.
Your Top 10 Traits
1. Liberal
2. Adventurous
3. Big-Hearted
4. Athletic
5. Sensual
6. Practical
7. Intellectual
8. Outgoing
9. Stylish
10. Wealthy/Ambitious
Your date match profile:
Big-Hearted - You want someone compassionate, someone gentle and kind. A loving, nurturing person will fill that hole in your life.
Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living.
Adventurous - You are looking for someone who is willing to try new things and experience life to its fullest. You need a companion who encourages you to take risks and do exciting things.
Your Top 10 Match Traits
1. Big-Hearted
2. Practical
3. Adventurous
4. Athletic
5. Outgoing
6. Conservative
7. Intellectual
8. Sensual
9. Wealthy/Ambitious
10. Stylish
Take the Online Dating Profile Quiz at Dating Diversions
What am I to do
I am doing a job that seriously will bring me to nowhere, at least not where I want to be some years down the road. Quit? Leave? Change? I need a career switch, yet I haven't got a single idea what is it that I will want to do. Maybe there are just too many choices, or maybe I haven't made up my mind, or maybe the right choice hasn't come into my view... What is it??? Where is it?? When is it???? I feel stuck in a rut, and I really need to get out of this.
My hatred for someone has grown so much, not that I was aware of. It's so overwhelming I could feel that pain inside... How do I release it, I guess the person whom caused it is my only solution for lifting it... That's what I believe. I have to face it and I actually am quite anxious to see my own reaction to the situation again. I know I have to do some self-control before it gets out of control again! Why can't women be themselves, be emotional, why do you men think expressing emotions is crazy or a form of weakness??
Further studies?? Or escape? I feel like going back to the books again, but not sure if I just want to escape from what I am doing or am I really keen to study again. Perhaps I should do a short course for my new career path?? I think I should but what is it that I should be taking up? Can I leave Singapore for some time, I don't know why... Singapore hasn't got anything I really must avoid, but somehow I feel like being away all alone for a while.
p.s: Finally it is Friday... some time to ponder about my new career path! Or rather my brand new life...
My hatred for someone has grown so much, not that I was aware of. It's so overwhelming I could feel that pain inside... How do I release it, I guess the person whom caused it is my only solution for lifting it... That's what I believe. I have to face it and I actually am quite anxious to see my own reaction to the situation again. I know I have to do some self-control before it gets out of control again! Why can't women be themselves, be emotional, why do you men think expressing emotions is crazy or a form of weakness??
Further studies?? Or escape? I feel like going back to the books again, but not sure if I just want to escape from what I am doing or am I really keen to study again. Perhaps I should do a short course for my new career path?? I think I should but what is it that I should be taking up? Can I leave Singapore for some time, I don't know why... Singapore hasn't got anything I really must avoid, but somehow I feel like being away all alone for a while.
p.s: Finally it is Friday... some time to ponder about my new career path! Or rather my brand new life...
6.7.06
Why lehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
He didn't appear.... Is he hiding??? Has he dug a hole and put his head in like the ostrich??
5.7.06
Italy, can you stop France from winning the World Cup?
Germany finally lost in the semi-finals....... Secretly I feel jubilant. I have wanted them to win when I watched the first World Cup match, but as the matches go on.... I've changed my mind. I wanted them out of the World Cup final, and yesterday it came true. Italy has successfully kicked them out in the last few minutes of extra time - bliss! Thank you, Italy (sorry you germany fans) :))))))))))
4.7.06
I don't want to hate anymore
Heard of a term called "selective hearing"? Choose part of the conversation to go into your listening ears and filter the rest as "noise"... I wish there is such a thing called "selective remembering", so I can filter the junks out of my tiny brain. I know there are the short-termed and long-termed memory, why didn't God program it such a way that the bad things are always on short-termed and the good ones on the long-termed??
Days after my MC have been incredibly slow and low... I felt as if I lost myself somewhere while recuperating. I seem to have misplaced my high-spirited self, been robbed away of my perseverance, fully drained of all my vigor... Now I feel so feebly weak, kind of powerless. Like a terminally ill patient waiting for the D-day to come. What's D day?? Death day??
I'm waiting for the day to reborn, waiting for the day to die and start all over again...
Days after my MC have been incredibly slow and low... I felt as if I lost myself somewhere while recuperating. I seem to have misplaced my high-spirited self, been robbed away of my perseverance, fully drained of all my vigor... Now I feel so feebly weak, kind of powerless. Like a terminally ill patient waiting for the D-day to come. What's D day?? Death day??
I'm waiting for the day to reborn, waiting for the day to die and start all over again...
2.7.06
Who will win the world cup this time?
Brazil lost to France... that is a shocking surprise!! England lost to Portugal, this one many of us have expected it to come... The final 4 - Germany, Italy, France and Portugal. How exciting, the outcome this year is definitely going to be something new. Even though Germany has a higher possibility of winning I secretly wish to see them lose.
1.7.06
Jobsite says I am a ...
Believer!
As a Believer you believe the world has almost infinite possibilities. You believe people should be pursuing their passions and not be caught up by what others say they should desire. Your entire life involves continuously having new experiences and learning from them. It is the challenge, the risk, the prospect of what you can achieve that drives you, rather than simply making money. You're a self-motivated individual driven by your passion and so need a job and environment with loose boundaries and maximum freedom.
As a Believer you believe the world has almost infinite possibilities. You believe people should be pursuing their passions and not be caught up by what others say they should desire. Your entire life involves continuously having new experiences and learning from them. It is the challenge, the risk, the prospect of what you can achieve that drives you, rather than simply making money. You're a self-motivated individual driven by your passion and so need a job and environment with loose boundaries and maximum freedom.
On MC, happily sick
5 days on the job, and then I was struck by the disease monster... Actually had been physically close to some people whom were carrying the "virus" and didn't realise my immune system wasn't as strong as before. It hit me hard on Wednesday night... Fever, sore throat, flu, headache, bodyache...
I felt horrible. What made it worse was this annoying colleague of mine whom couldn't resist not giving me a call about work, he's such an inconsiderate idiot!! I am much happier that the 2 days of medical leave, I do not have to face him and attend to the pile of shit he shoved in my direction. But the nightmare shall begin on Monday, sometimes working with him really gets my blood boiling...
If someone from a teaching profession could come and join an online portal as a content producer without any knowledge of what's a site structure, how the FTP works and understanding the work flow... Then me too can easily have a switch of profession, isn't it? Or is it just the piece of paper stating, "So and so graduated from blah blah University" that matters more to the society and organization these days??
Someone, please tell me,"Sorry but this is how Singapore works, it sucks!" and I will totally agree with them.
I felt horrible. What made it worse was this annoying colleague of mine whom couldn't resist not giving me a call about work, he's such an inconsiderate idiot!! I am much happier that the 2 days of medical leave, I do not have to face him and attend to the pile of shit he shoved in my direction. But the nightmare shall begin on Monday, sometimes working with him really gets my blood boiling...
If someone from a teaching profession could come and join an online portal as a content producer without any knowledge of what's a site structure, how the FTP works and understanding the work flow... Then me too can easily have a switch of profession, isn't it? Or is it just the piece of paper stating, "So and so graduated from blah blah University" that matters more to the society and organization these days??
Someone, please tell me,"Sorry but this is how Singapore works, it sucks!" and I will totally agree with them.
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