31.1.06

Luck is changing, can it be the DOG year??

99.9% of the time when you book a budget flight, and unfortunately due to whatever shit, you're not able to make it... you are not going to get ANY refund at all. That is for sure. It's budget, it's €0 or £0 for the flights, all you pay is their taxes.

I recently booked a flight to Milan, and due to unforeseen circumstances, I won't be able to go along with it anymore. The website offers a NO CANCELLATION policy. So there was nothing I could do. I even thought of selling them on ebay, just pay some fee for the changes. But that didn't work out to be worth so much trouble. I thought,"Oh well, what a luck! Let it be."

Some days ago, I received an email about the flight that I booked to Milan. There were changes in the time schedule, I was asked to accept it. I didn't bother, since I am not going anyway. And there wasn't any option for me to cancel or say NO to it. So funny, how can they force you to accept something!? Strange enough, today I got a reminder email about the flight. This time, I read carefully under that "Click to accept" link and I am now allowed to cancel or change the flight for free by calling the hotline.

Of course I rang them up. I am getting a FULL REFUND!! It's like a miracle, I guess sometimes patience does pay off. This is really rare (a 0.1% chance) and I credit it mostly to luck! Can this year be a better one for me after the Lunar Chinese New Year??? I certainly am very hopeful about it =)

What I really miss about CNY @ home

Pineapple tarts - especially the ones made by my auntie!!! Getting dressed and groomed for house-visiting - which I normally do not put so much make-up even for shopping or work!! Eating the chilli "Ba Gua" - BBQ pork/chicken slices... mmmmm!! Chance to drink lot of soft drinks and chocolate without feeling guilty. Steamboat for reunion dinner!! Getting "Ang pao" (Red packet) is not really something I look forward, since it always doesn't accumulate to that much anyway... but I love the chance to see everyone else. Uncles, aunties, grandma, cousins... which I do not often get to! Laze and be lazy, waiting for people to hand me an "Ang pao"... ha, this one I certainly do not miss. I think it really bores me to death!!

29.1.06

1 of the 1st chinese entry

心血来潮。。。突然好想练习一下我的母语!

好久好久没听见收熟 悉的华文歌曲了,终天这一天来到了。。。 从来都没盼着这么一天,听着听着它不时让我想起了家 - 新加坡! 第一次在国外度过农历新年,如果你问我感觉如何,我会告诉你是那么的平凡!! 虽然有些中国和台湾朋友的陪伴, 始终心里还是像外头的雪地那么的冷冰冰!我需要些温暖, 又上哪儿找起呢?

大伙都说狗年好,会带来更多的收获。 我只期望它能赶走我心底的不愉快,恨恨地咬我一口。。。 让我脑子清醒一些!!

好高兴喔,我还没忘了我心爱的母语, 更没忘了我的文笔!

第一次用华语写我的网络笔记也不想多提太多的不愉快。。稍候见! 啊,忘了告诉大家昨天的杂技表演棒极了;)


p.s: Those whom do not understand Mandarin, I hope you do not pass around my blog-link to chinese friends whom can translate. I will do a brief summary here - I have not listened to chinese songs for a long time and the day arrived. It made me think of home - Singapore. I am spending the 1st Lunar New Year out of Singapore, if you ask me how it is, I will tell you how ordinary it is. Even with my Chinese friends (from China & taiwan), I felt desolated. I need some warmth, where can I find them? Everyone say the Year of Dog will be better, I only wish it will chase away my unhappiness and give me a painful bite - so it wakes me up! I'm so happy I haven't forgot how to write fluently in Mandarin.

Life without you :D

没有兔子的生活一定会更好!!!

虽然抱着许多的不舍和那一段快乐与悲伤日子, 世上最完美无瑕的时刻多半都是短暂的。熟语说得好 --" 不在乎天长地久,只在乎曾经用有"。。。一直以来都没有真正体会它的含义,今天尝一尝它那甜苦的滋味也是一种人生经验吧!

恋爱痛苦,爱人更痛苦。惨了惨了!! 放心吧,我还没对全世界的男人绝望,也没必要对他们耿耿于怀。 世上的好男人还没绝种,我将抱着更开阔的心胸面对我的未来。我从来没为了个男人而放弃自己,现在不会将来也不会。。。 为自己而活的生命是宝贵的!

好多的时候我常常在想:
我好像爱自己比爱他多,我也说不清为什么

我仿佛还在自己的小世界里躲着,躲着些什么我也搞不明白

偶尔把头伸出去望一望. 好想离开这个小世界

不想再被它困住了, 好想解脱那邦着我的死结

有时候也把手伸出去, 能感觉到他温存地握着我的小手

我好喜欢这种温暖的感觉,好喜欢,好盼望

但他始终没把我从小世界里救出来

我只能时断时续听见他在呼唤着我

对着他那熟悉的脸孔,我时常犹豫不决
也许他能带给我的不是我在寻找的

或许他那温和地握着我的手只是那么的短暂

可能那能把我取出来的人不是他


p.s: sorry but no translation for this one, just a description of my feelings...

27.1.06

Burn it with passion

As I am preparing to burn away those letters I wrote him... I got curious and began to re-read them. I feel like giving myself a knock on the head, or a sudden urge to tear them into pieces. I read a lot of optimism I had about the relationship, wonder why so often I did not see the reasons behind the things that went wrong... Did I not get the hint??? Or was I just too blind to see!!

It all started with this phrase "Die Kartoffel wartet auf den Hasen" and the happy story began... but the sad story shall end with this "Wo ist die Liebe, wo ist die Erinnerungen"... Keine Liebe, keine Erinnerungen!

26.1.06

10 Simple Reasons

To make myself feel better today, I'm writing 10 stupid but reasonable reasons of our differences... Things that I like and he doesn't!! At least it does make me feel that one day someone else will appreciate what I like =)

1. I like bright pink, but he doesn't
2. I like seafood especially squids, and he doesn't
3. I like simple breakfast, he likes a buffet breakfast that is full of cheese and meat
4. I like horror films, he doesn't and denies being scared
5. I like to take risks in life, he doesn't (probably only risky sports)
6. I prefer flavoured tea, he likes black tea
7. I like to shower after a long day out, he likes to do that before going out (actually I do both when I'm in SG)
8. I like to express my emotions, he doesn't (like all other men)
9. I like how a pretzel is, he removes the salt
10. I like aggressive men, he isn't

25.1.06

Little netherlands - Eindhoven

Only been there a couple of hours... in the citycentre. It really reminds me of Cologne, the shopping districts I meant. Eindhoven has a funky airport, small but pretty. I didn't feel it has a lot to offer but perhaps its just like every small town with their own characteristic and flavour. But Netherlands really gives one a good feeling, relaxed country to be in!

24.1.06

Soak in it - Barcelona has it all***

Coming next, Barcelona was superb...

Name it, it has it all. Culture, yummy food, Gaudi architecture, the right atmosphere, lovely beach, affordable shopping, good weather, efficient transport... So far, I haven't got a complaint. Even map-reading for me is easy, remember girls are supposed to be bad at map-reading! It might be the "squares" plan of the city, it makes things a lot easier, street names a lot simpler.

Oh, perhaps one thing... nothing is almost free in Barcelona. It is a "clever" money-making city, it makes money out of anything. A few visits to the Gaudi building can certainly burn a hole in your pocket, probably a free and fantastic option is Park Guell. We were/I was in the Park Guell, Sagrada Familia, La Pedrera (Casa Mila), Barcelona FC Museum, walked down Las Ramblas... watched the Magic Fountain of Montjuic, been to the Port Vell and across to Maremagnum shopping mall, happened to visit church Santa Maria del Mar when there was an ongoing service. We also walked about a lot of places, to the former Olympic Stadium (but didn't get to go in), near Picasso Museum, along Placa de Catalunya to Passeig de Gràcia and up Avenue diagonal... I love the shopping street in Passeig de Gràcia, even though I didn't get anything there. El born is my favourite area, where the Picasso Museum is situated, or the gothic area as well. It is mostly lined up with stylish restaurants and pubs.

I was at Icària beach (they have a total of 4 beaches), wasn't a long stay due to the short daylight. However they have some pretty shells, calm sea and some pretty sight. I bet in summer it will be a blast!

For accomodation, I should say we had the finest picks. The hostel I booked was fabulous, its location and atmosphere and the really cheap prices made it all worth. It was just 3 nights we stayed at Backpacker BCN before we moved to my next selected choice, Hostal Central. It was almost like a hotel with free towels, sink in the room and a neat double bed. The room looks very sweet, the hostal has friendly service, it is really a bargain for its quality and location.

Day trip 1: Figueres -- Dali Museum
A short train away, Dali Museum certainly is worth the hour of travelling. I read even though it does not contain Dali's best works, but they featured most of the works he had created when he first started off or made him popular. It is situated in this town, Figueres, where Dali used to be for a while, it certainly has its own character and we were at a mid-day market.

Day trip 2: Montserrat
Montserrat is slightly more difficult to get to, with the train timing at every half or an hour. We didn't realise the Cable car to the mountain wasn't working (what a luck, just began the maintenance work the day we embarked). So we had to wait for an hour for the next train to get to the next station where we can take a train up to Montserrat. Up there you can visit the Monastery or its museum, go for an audio-visual show, take two different funicular rides up or down the mountain, do a bit of trekking and walking in the nature which is very relaxing but tense if you're rushing for time. It has short visiting hours in Winter, I think it has more than a day's worth of visit if you are really into "a spiritual place" and nature.

To sum it up, even a heart-broken person like me can enjoy Barcelona, it really says something about it... doesn't it!!

23.1.06

Zuuuuurich

Despite being infamous for bringing me bad memories... I am still going to talk about this place, Zurich.

There is nothing spectacular about this city. A lot like London because of its comsopolitanism, something good about getting around is most of them speak or understand English. Well, German is still the main language there but doesn't give you a problem if you do not speak the language.

The museums aren't the most interesting things about in the city, but the Zurich Pass does make a lot worth. The boat trip around Lake Zurich is cool, I recommend that. A trip up to Uetliberg gives a fantastic view, you can even sit and watch the alps - which you probably only see on a "The Alps" Calendar. There is the chocolate factory that produces Lindt chocolate, for those whom are obsessed by Charlie & the Chocolate Factory! Sadly, there is no visit allowed in the chocolate-making factory, all you can do is to shop at its Lindt's chocolate warehouse.

Food is incredibly expensive, shopping is extensive but only for the rich, weather is extremely cold, city is safe and people are quite helpful... Visit it because it's famous but not to expect something extraordinary or romantic.

When I look out of the window, I see sunshine...

Not just sunlight, but sunshine... the light that is giving me hope!

It has been over a week... the mental torture is yet to be over. However, I am feeling exceptionally better than I thought I would be which is a good thing. A lot of random thoughts have been screening through my head...

Like the Bonsai he has bought, I feel like the dying plant. Dealing with a living thing which is best survived in warm temperature with lot of sunlight, can be such a challenge in the very cold Germany (ah, in winter). Within two weeks we had the Bonsai, it has dried up, its leaves curled to a crisp as though it will fall just the moment your finger comes in touch with it. I tried to read up forum looking how to save the poor little thing, it always give me hope that it will soon regain to its healthy and blooming state. But for a month, it did not improve... We continue to water it wishing a miracle will happen, but it never does... and probably never ever will...

Like it, I am withering... Unlike it, I never knew I would never be saved again... Looking at its leaves, my heart is also deteriorating... curling and drying up.


I always thought ending up with a man who couldn't speak the fluent native English will never pose a big problem... I thought love language speaks louder than a real language... I thought a man whom didn't like Durians and Frog-leg porridge would be more open to other things than just food... I thought he would be more interested in my culture than I would in his... I thought understanding my Singlish has already meant accepting me... I thought doing things together show that how much fun we could have together... I thought his friends do not have to be Mine as well... He thought my friends should be his as well... He always think I am thinking like how he has assumed... I always thought that he could understand me better...

There are too much assumption and ideal, but unfortunately reality doesn't work the way you always see it to be.

20.1.06

I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills m

It is unlikely of me to express my grief over something here, especially about my relationship. But now if you're reading this, you're probably "luckier" than most people who are not my blog readers. For a start, you should be able to guess... I trust you to be "sensitive enough"...

Yes, I am once single again. It is not if I haven't been for a long time before I got into this relationship. How would I describe this emotional turmoil I am undergoing - two words --> Intense pain. It felt like I've gotten a terminal disease, and it was utterly hopeless. I don't wish to explain further, but if you would have understood the situation when it happened... probably you could imagine being in my shoes.

In the first 3 days, I have been through what most women would do - yes, cry it out. I have been fortunate enough to have supportive friends even though they weren't physically there with me. In a week, I have come to terms with it. There always have been a lot of doubts about where I was heading, how things would be... It did kind of lift off those loads now, I feel that both of us are much relieved.

About leaving the man I still love, it still takes a few more times of heart shattering. It is impossible to forget those time we have had, to erase the fantasy we once built, to take away mixture of hurt and love. I only wish that God has made this arrangement in the fairness of both our happiness and I believe that He has.

To the man I love:

I believe that you're a God-send whom has helped me through the most difficult time in my life, I'm grateful and shall always bear in mind that no other being has been as close to me as you have. There have been lot of times I felt I could have done more but I didn't, I am still holding back. I still do not understand why I was doing that, perhaps things were meant to go this way no matter how hard we have tried. The future has a separate plan for both of us and I do wish the best things will happen. No matter how faraway we are going to be from each other, I will never be able to find a replacement in my heart for the person whom you are and whom I love. Many warm hugging love from ME.

9.1.06

TIME

TIME is really a Test for such an Impatient person like ME.

There are a lot of time in my life that I wish I could be more patient. Sometimes time really does heal a wound, to make you realize a better "you", test your ability to overcome "shit", show you how much someone means to you or vice versa... But like a lot of people whom enjoy "short-cuts" in life, I am one of those. "Short-cuts" save you time and effort, but is it the right way to reach a goal or get you something?? I don't know. I think patience is a gem, a very valuable trait in a person's personality. How can I achieve that?? That patience I once had... long ago... is still missing.

In many recent incidents, I know God is testing my patience (Note: I don't always use God for everything, ok). I hope I see what he is trying to make me see, and I know it myself a lot of times, which is why I really wish I have more patience. But I am always losing them.

I hope TIME will prove me right that it is worth all that effort and "restraint".

7.1.06

Know your German brands

Did you know that .... originated from Germany??? Oh, really???

Not long ago, I came across a book compiling all the famous German brands. To my surprise, there are quite a few that I didn't realize they are German. Okay, here is a list of the ones I can remember, have a tick on your "mental" checklist ;)

German Brands I know of:
1. Nivea
2. Mercedes-Benz
3. VW
4. Bosch
5. BrAun
6. Adidas
7. Milka
8. Haribo
9. Becks
10. DHL
11. Lufthansa

German Brands I just realized:
1. Triumph
2. Audi
3. Uhu
4. Maggi
5. Siemens
6. AGFA
7. Leica

2.1.06

Bye bye 2005

HAPPY 2006 EVERYONE!!!

Oh man
... another year is gone. And very soon my Working Holiday Visa is expiring... I can't believe it, I still remember vividly the months I was spending in London, adapting to a whole new environment and enjoying the freedom and heading the route to self-discovery. One and a half year has since become a history, and with this I can also count the months I've been with Flo (mein Schatz). And not long ago, Angela has decided to join me in the holiday making experience - I guess she has a bit more time than me to still enjoy the sights!

Everybody like to do a bit of re-capping at the end of the year of what they have accomplished, for me I can't put them into words. I can only say for the last 2 years, there has been a lot of learning experience for me. Things happened, progressed, changed... in my family back home, in my relationship, in my friendship, in my working experience in London, my travels in europe and also with my own self. I should say I am still very glad I am in one piece, and at the moment am happy with my life and very much looking forward to the new year. Yes, 2006!

My horror or fear of returning back home has since disappeared. Instead, I feel eager to see my friends back home again, to find a super GREAT job and earn more money for future holidays. Somehow I have a lot of "ideas" of what to do when I get home, but nothing seems to be in the right picture yet. I am also wondering how has Angela changed since her experience in London - I believe it is going to shape her up;) or it already did!?

As to the last few days before the end of 2005, I have done some new stuffs. I tried Ebay, bought the Lomo Fisheye Camera I had been yearning for. Ebay is cool, I think I will try a bit more shopping on there! Me and Flo got this PC-DVD game and we have now completed it in 3 days - good partnership. It is called Black Mirror (only in German.. Schade!), it is like an adventurous mystery where you go speak to important people and solve the puzzles! I give it 4.5 stars out of 5 for its amazing graphics and animation!! Fantastic characters and buildings, witty plot. TOTALLY RECOMMENDED!! Lady luck has also been on my side a little, I was booking my hostel for the coming holiday... just a few minutes before I booked the "only double room", someone else just hit his/her booking button! Damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn... I was cursing, swearing... actually I was more upset than angry... and I tried for hours hoping something will happen. And it really did, some hours later, as I refreshed the page, the room became available again. That someone could have cancelled it. I couldn't believe my luck... so I grabbed my opportunity this time:D

As for my achievements last year, I am proud to say I have attended a German Language Course - at the very least I can speak and understand some now!! Oh I should give myself a pat for the solo travelling I did some months ago to Ireland and York/Scotland. --> it does feel a little weird mentioning 2005 as last year now!


Let's welcome this new year with open arms!! Even though we are again getting one year older, I hope this year brings us bigger surprises!