Thinking of you

My facebook status read,"Be with someone who brings out the best in you!"

A message I wanted to send to my friends in relationship woes. I finally realised what others meant when they say being single isn't a bad thing. Two of my friends were tearing over their men. I wanted to console them but I felt so helpless. That quote just came to me when I was in the shower and I thought I would share it.

Everyone of us is imperfect. But there is that someone who will still love us for who we are, accomodate us, compromise together and tries to bring out the best in us. Right? Well, I believe so.

In my past, I had been with guys whom brought out the worst in me. I guess probably I was also younger then, more inexperienced and somehow naive. I could recall my impatient nature, jealousy and insecurity surfacing when I was with R (names are protected for privacy issue). While A constantly put me down, and with him I was never good enough. I even thought it was okay to be treated bad when you really liked the other person. How foolish! One fine day, H came along, I realised that someone does exist. He encouraged me, he listened, I never felt the need to be insecure, jealous or even impatient. Yet, we aren't together. Somebody said loving someone is not owning them, is that true?

Well if there was one, there will be others. But now I do know that's the one I'm searching for. I believe he's also looking for me now ;)

Women and their spending

Have you (a woman) sometimes just feel like spending? That's why we call it retail therapy. We spend to make ourselves feel good. Unlike men, they usually spend their money like making an investment, e.g. Spending on a girlfriend. Recently, I just feel like doing myself a favour - spending. On the good days, I prevent myself from buying unnecessary stuff. On the bad days, I think about the things I have been considering to buy and go get them. And fortunately the things I got aren't overly expensive, they are usually some cute stuff, things that make me pretty or food that I don't usually pamper myself with. But it's making me feel good, why not?

Women go mad...

Magazines, magazines, magazines... I am caught in the frenzy, so are my friends (& colleagues). We are mad, gone mad.

If you follow this blog (also look at his other links), you will know exactly what I mean. We are victims of fashion, slaves of brands and sinners of freebies. Women, why are your lives so difficult and filled with all kinds of temptation - just like the temptation of married men??

This month, I have gotten 7 magazines excluding one I bought specially for Taiwan research. All 7 are fashion related: 3 Japanese (1 magazine, 2 e-mooks also known as product catalogue), 1 Taiwanese, 1 Hong Kong, 2 local (but overseas' titles). That's a bit too much, I almost felt that I am compensating the lack of magazines' purchase for the whole of last year!

I also have spent a lot this month... I just don't know why, it seems like I'm getting out of control. I can't stop myself from taking out the card. Curb it!!!!!! I shall. I should think of how much I need to save for the coming trip, yes, please!!

I have signed one year of my life with Kinokuniya, and I know I will fall for it again (yes, magazines!). But I will impose myself a limit, and I won't give in easily. Yes, I can discipline myself ;)

For now, I am glad March is coming to an end... and no more for this month! I promised "3 months no more Japanese magazines", let's see how good I am at resisting :x

Smart woman I

Things a single woman can do without having a man: Tonnes! The list goes on and on but the most important one to be mentioned is: To be able to love oneself more than the man does. How many of us can do that??

A lot of my friends complained about loneliness, depression and how much they needed sex or hugs after they recently became single... but do you actually know that it is the best time to realise how much you can do for yourself and not for your man! When I see how some women's life are all evolved about their partner, sad but true, I don't envy them at all... It's a different life or perhaps a different perspective but I do like some sort of independence and I think it does more advantage than harm. Who will know if this man of yours will suddenly leave you, or worst, abandoned you with the kids? Seen too many real live examples, not that I'm skeptical about it, but a woman needs to know how to protect herself.

Anyhow I was suppsed to write about other stuff... LOL... getting side-tracked again, I know!!! But another thing women can do pretty well without men is pampering themselves!!!!! Okay, shall continue in my next entry!

Am I one of the normal women or the abnormal?

I just realized one thing. One of my buddies is obsessed with or craving for the attention from men, especially the unavailable or the wrong types. She flirts with them and seems very happy to be able to be their focus even for a minute or two. Has it something to do with self-esteem or ego??

I don't understand. I don't get such attention and don't yearn to have it from men whom are totally strangers or even acquaintances. I feel happier having more intelligent conversation than feeling proud that someone is physically attracted to me. All men do like a beautiful face, that is true, but how long can that physical attraction last, I really wonder...

Looking at the others within our group, none of us are attention-seekers. Perhaps we are a little more reserved, sometimes shy... I am pretty certain the rest of us only enjoy the attention from the right guy, someone who is sincere, obviously attracted to and into us.

Tell me which is more normal... or perhaps there are 2 kinds of women in this world...

Overflowing

Women.

Do most women have over-flowing affection, or maybe just me?? So often I find myself giving so much of what I have, to be returned with much lesser of what I can expect. I can't seem to find myself swallowing in self-pity or blaming the women's nature, but instead I hold on to the hope that one day just one man can so perfectly understand how I feel and reciprocate more often.

So much had those sweet-talking worked on me, it doesn't have that same effect anymore. I'm just a normal woman craving for so much affection!

OMS

Ongoing Menstrual Syndrome

Probably we have only heard about PMS (Pre-menstrual syndrome), but its a fact I'm suffering from OMS. My emotions get fluctuated to the extreme at any slightest matter. I believe I also get very particular, irritable, and in a very likelihood to provoke the others. I just did last night, to my sister, her usual hot temper didn't make things better. So I don't care. I'm in that mood that "I am always right; I've my rights. Just shut up!"...

I require attention to distract all my highly hyperactive hormones. I need to be handle with care. Yes, care even when it comes to words!! I want to say I'm lovesick, but in actual fact, I'd to think its that time of the month the cause of everything. Perhaps I need to be caged every time it happens...

I'm sick of being a woman. I'm kidding but its true I hate the hormones...

Em0tiona!!y F#cked Up

Sorry about the harsh words... But its crap!!

Crap to be feeling emotionally empty. Not lonely. Its the feeling you can't go with your emotions. I hate the women's inborn gift to be more more more emotional than men. To know yourself by heart but to follow through by head. Things happened, as they do all the time. Every passing day minus away the time I'm left here is filled with my own anxiety and rashness. Doing things you do not have self-control about, engaging in stuffs you'll have to withdraw from later. I don't think you guys understand what I'm bullshitting about right now. It's just me!!

mmm... fuck the hormones :(

Women cry for no reason

Or at least I do...

I was mentally stressed out, physically tired and emotionally drained. For the past week, a holiday didn't manage to help me relax, and coming back to work with a lot more to think about is driving me up the wall! There's too much going on and too much to be done. It's overloading!! I'm completed fucked up at work, in social life and love life. How frustrating can that be...

I met a friend yesterday. I'm totally unprepared I'd have broke down in tears. There isn't a reason, really. He has made me felt so comfortable in his company that my tears flowed down so easily. For once in so many months, I let out a sense of relief. I feel better. Men do not understand women, and never will they (they might think they do). I can't give a reason for my sudden emotional stir up, but the fact that if I do cried in front of you... I'm feeling safe with you. I trust you.

I'm a woman who has nowhere to turn to, I'm a woman who cries. I'm a human, I need breathing space. Everything that is going on in my life right now is suffocating me, an oxygen mask does not work anymore. I need everyone to leave...

Women women woman

There is this thing going on between me and Orange Pages.

Wait, Orange Pages refers to a boutique located in a hotel shopping mall. 100 metres from my office maybe. I'm like a regular customer now. And today I finally stepped in after months of refraining from shopping. Almost every single time I frequent it, I'll leave the shop with something new. It seems like I must spend the $$$. Have they casted a spell on me?? Or I just couldn't resist not buying. I could walk the whole of Orchard Road without coming home with even a slightly newer thing. But with Orange Pages, it just has this effect on me, I've to go back there. Once I visited but found nothing I liked, I smiled goodbye to the lady owner. And I actually felt bad. They have beautiful women apparel, I especially love the ones with beads or unique folds. Sale is simply worth the money, you can find things 70% cheaper... wow.

10 things that drive woman crazy:
1. Shopping
2. Emotions
3. Sex
4. PMS
5. Size does matter
6. Gaining weight
7. Being dumped
8. Falling in love
9. Other women
10. Men