He exists

"You can always find work, but you don't always find love."

This just came to me and I thought I should write it down. Yeah, isn't it? I always thought to myself, do all women think the same? Maybe not. Maybe my sister is one of those that places money over love. Maybe its cirumstances, maybe its her choice. She's always thinking of how to make big money - maybe like many other men. It's good, a motivation for entrepreneurship, that's what makes life a little more interesting. Yet I am somewhat of an opposite, I rather retreat into my little house by the beach with the love of my life, we can be poor (preferably not) but we should be contented and happy.

I dread men who worry about my ability to support myself, because it seems like they are not ready to even be supportive of me. I had met guys when I was in between jobs, and they probably thought if I didn't have work, I would be depending on them. Then they are wrong, they do not know me. Sorry to say, then they are not right for me. I also dread guys whom think I travel too much, because they would be thinking,"Gosh, she must not have any savings because she's just travelling too much." Then they would start multiplying negative thoughts in their heads just like the former category kind of men. They probably have no idea what travelling is all about and do not know what hostels are for.

And I know that kind of guy I want to meet, he knows how to have fun whether I am working or not, whether I am travelling or not. He thinks about travelling with me, he thinks about all the dates he can have when I've so much free time. He knows that I can support myself and I will find my means to live. Yes, I know he exists :)

Thinking of you

My facebook status read,"Be with someone who brings out the best in you!"

A message I wanted to send to my friends in relationship woes. I finally realised what others meant when they say being single isn't a bad thing. Two of my friends were tearing over their men. I wanted to console them but I felt so helpless. That quote just came to me when I was in the shower and I thought I would share it.

Everyone of us is imperfect. But there is that someone who will still love us for who we are, accomodate us, compromise together and tries to bring out the best in us. Right? Well, I believe so.

In my past, I had been with guys whom brought out the worst in me. I guess probably I was also younger then, more inexperienced and somehow naive. I could recall my impatient nature, jealousy and insecurity surfacing when I was with R (names are protected for privacy issue). While A constantly put me down, and with him I was never good enough. I even thought it was okay to be treated bad when you really liked the other person. How foolish! One fine day, H came along, I realised that someone does exist. He encouraged me, he listened, I never felt the need to be insecure, jealous or even impatient. Yet, we aren't together. Somebody said loving someone is not owning them, is that true?

Well if there was one, there will be others. But now I do know that's the one I'm searching for. I believe he's also looking for me now ;)

Gentlemen

It's his birthday!

I know he just turned 34. Thanks to that we get a little slice of Cedele's carrot cake! It's still so yummy like before but I didn't remember it tasting so good the last time I had it. I guess the mood counts ;)

Also I had Four Leaves' chocolate cake topped with raspberries for Mothers' day just yesterday. If not for the second spinning class at lunch time, I would be feeling extremely guilty!

The spinning class today is an introduction class, I should be doing this as my first really but couldn't make it on the last few Mondays. It was nice and easy. This time, there were 2 guys and 3 girls (including me). The guy next to me was really helpful, and taught me how to adjust the seat, fasten the pedals and even picked up my dropped towel in the middle of the class. I knew I dropped it but it was too inconvenient to get down and so I just left it. Such a kind act makes me realise there are still gentlemen around! Well, the birthday boy is one too :)

For now, I like a good night's sleep and no aches in the morning!

Ewwww

I was reading online and somehow got to the Sarong Party Girl blog and found an article on Finnish men, and I just thought I would read it and see if it is true.

Quoted from her blog:
"An outgoing Finnish man would be considered introverted anywhere else in the world. I have met talkative Finns, it's when they've had several cases of beer and I have gotten used to the general lack of conversation."

"A Finn will not hit on you, even when he is really drunk, and even then he might not do so. So if at the end of the date, you would want something more, you have to make it obvious. You know how all French men assume you would sleep with them if you go out on a date? Finns are the exact opposite. The only time he will hit on you is when you are in his bedroom. And even then."

I don't think so!!! Or the ones I met in Taiwan are a different breed. Well, one was really talkative and would go on and on and on, while the other one who tried in get on my bed was super quiet and seemed introvert. 

Quoted from her blog:
"All men are easy when they are drunk enough not to be self-conscious, and the Finns will drink till they are boderline comatose so they can approach a girl."

But I think she got this right, they drank a lot and probably would only have courage after they got really drunk. This is so FREAKY.

Anyhow, I am still keeping my distance from them!!

Are you fit to be choosy?

I am really turned off by someone when he tells me after looking at a picture of the opposite sex, she isn't his type. Well, we all have choices and preferences, I respect that. But telling me that just by looking at a picture, that is just shallow. If you judge a person by a photo, you're merely telling me you've read a book by just reading the title or looking at its cover! No wonder he hasn't been able to find a girlfriend for years, the problem with him is he thinks too highly of himself and expects something that is beyond his capability. Sorry for the ranting, but that's very childish behaviour and I reckon he's better off buying a Vietnamese wife by choosing from the catalogue. I don't like to matchmake and it isn't really my forte. Sometimes my friends happened to get together because they hit it off well. And no, I don't allow people to pick from pictures like they are ordering food from a menu. Don't give me the BULLSHIT someone is or is not your type from a photo, because then you're bloody shallow. He even had the guts to tell me another friend is prettier but too bad, she's beyond what he's capable of providing just because I know my friend too well. So disappointed with the species of men these days... If you don't meet someone in reality, don't give me the crap of "your type", because a relationship is not based on "your ideal image of a maiden". I just wish I had the courage to tell him, "Look at yourself in the mirror and ask if you're capable to attract the type you're WISHING for!".

James Franco

I like :)

God...

Please stop sending me men that needs a healer, mender, psychiatrist, therapist, counselor, a sugar mummy or even a mistress!

ENOUGH is ENOUGH.

天啊，这个世纪的男人为什么这样？

Lord, what happened to the men you made this century????

I try to breathe. I try not to think about it.

The men around me recently are freaking like women??? Well, I'm not saying they act exactly like women but where's their guts, principles and moral values - if they have any??? Okay, at least have a back bone.

Man 1: I'm still studying to be a lawyer, I'm poor. I'm looking for a sugar mummy to pay my expenses. I can pay her back when I'm a lawyer. (Can you ever assure you will be one, pathetic beggar?)

Man 2: I'm having financial woes. I split up with the ex-girlfriend, she costed me a bomb. I have to close my businesses now. I have no money so I need to work. Maybe you want to help me or join me do a business? (Com' on, get your life back!)

Man 3: I'm married and I flirt. I do not like to talk about my wife, perhaps I don't even have an active sexual life. So do you want to flirt with me? (Another jerk!)

Man 4: I'm looking for a girlfriend, but I don't know where to look. I go to pub with those singing hostesses... maybe one of them will fall in love with me one day? (Wake up, my friend!!)

Man 5: I have a girlfriend but we had a past. I still like you and I can still flirt with you, right? Who knows, maybe she's not the one and you are still a good back-up? (A**hole)

These five examples are just mere few of many I have encountered... and I can't say enough how much these people are beginning to annoy me!!

Beastly surprise

Read Jack Neo's affair.

Our infamous Singaporean director has made another hit, this time round with headline news of his affair being exposed. When I first read about the news on Yahoo, there was an initial surprise, but these days such things have been happening too often that it seems to be a trend. Right after Tiger Woods'?

The thing that disgusts me is that the woman is young enough to be his daughter or date his 19-year-old son (Edit: Seems like the news report is not reliable, it's said to be a 19-year-old daughter now)! But it serves him right... how mature is a 22-year-old??? She threatened to harm herself and even confronted Neo's wife? Not a surprise! To know that Mrs Neo actually is aware of the affair and still keeping her marriage intact - I wonder what is trust and commitment in a marriage? Perhaps it is only a piece of paper to these men.

It has even started a seriously long discussion on my friend's Facebook status - men and infidelity. Fortunately, there are still men who will not cheat (if they are as truthful as their words)... I almost talked myself into believing all the men being the same, and they will cheat at some point in their lives. Also unfortunately, all these things are not within our control but that person who is deciding on whether to cheat or not. Today, I believe a lot of people have cheated on their partners, and it boiled down to whether it was known to their partners. That's why "Ignorance is a bliss!"... but not when he starts to bring back some sexual diseases! To be unbiased, I think it's the same for women, a lot of married women have affairs too. What is this world coming to???

I watched a documentary on a tribe (Penan) in Sarawak, where lives are so much more simpler. No money, no jobs, no politics... they survive solely by hunting for food and providing for their loved ones. Why can't life be the same?

So people, if you're married and you cheat... you suck, you #!#@$#%@$% beast!

Things men can say

"Japanese chicks look like steamed chicken (Hainanese chicken), SEA girls like roasted chicken... and I find roasted chicken a lot yummier, especially the skin =)" -- quoted from a close friend of mine

You know, it can be very interesting to sit among a bunch of guys and hear the things they say. I have done it a couple of times where I was the only female in the crowd. They tell you about stalkers (ex-girlfriends), their prostitute-seeking adventure, their adorable kids, their view on marriage and sometimes women... and it makes me laugh. I don't mean to laugh at them but it can be so different from what a bunch of women share among themselves. It is also very enlightening to see some people's take on certain issues. E.g. Last night, Simon shared his views on early marriage and having kids early because he didn't want others to make fun of his kid having a "grandpa" sending him to school. I'm sure that isn't the main reason but hey, some people are sure limiting themselves to their "age". I don't think I want to live by numbers though yes sometimes you do feel that time is running out... but my motive is to do it when you feel READY!

Whatever you do, will you reap it back??

Do you believe in Karma??? If so, when will I be getting all the good Karma back???

I don't believe this, all the men I have met, liked and dated are coming from tragic relationships, or one that has left them hurt for years and years... Yet they come into my life, and I heal them or indirectly I did. They left happy, but what about me??? If there is Karma, are you ever going to pay me back for one lifetime (or happily ever after) with someone whom can return it to me??

Sometimes chances don't come twice...

Saigon afterthoughts

Dear Joy, and many of my regular readers....

I AM BACK!!

There is so much to write, however I've been only writing them in my head without the availability of internet on this holiday. I like that too as it is the only time, most of us take the break from sitting in front of a computer and really go do something!

First and foremost, I haven't been writing before the trip as I was actually getting fearful of the thought of traveling with someone totally new. An acquaintance. I shall further elaborate later on in this post. Besides that, I have been migrating most of my old blog entries over... I went through them, they reminded me of so much... things I did and what I thought when I was merely 22.

Back to my Saigon trip, I traveled with a new friend, H. It was very random and really weird to think of it now. We met online recently (in fact 3 weeks before the holiday), booked the trip barely 1 week after a MSN conversation, met up twice before we went to Saigon.

I didn't hold any expectation (of course) on this trip... Some of my friends actually thought I'm romantically linked to him (for God's sake, NO!). A guy and a girl on a trip, of course we're often mistaken as a pair, it didn't bother me as much as his attitude which began to really surface at many parts of the trip.

H appears to be one of the most easy-going people when I first met him. After a few shopping hunt for his shoes, I realized there is more behind this . That's only a facet of his multiple sides. He is a super-duper fussy shopper (worse than a woman). Closing one eye, you might still think he will make a good shopping buddy on a holiday.

Many things happened. I realized H can be such a MCP. E.g. on the night before we flew, he wanted to save his cab fare and decided to stay over at the airport. What more is that he expected me to do so with him??!!! I was caught with a minor cold, and decided against that, and he took it personally. I began to see the "not so understanding" side of him.

Before the trip, he was too busy so I made most of the planning as to where to visit and discussed with him. When we got there, he rather asked the hotel lady boss and wanted to change the whole plan if what she suggested seems much better than mine. I was quite tolerant towards this. It turned out that her suggestion was identical to what I have planned, so he went along with it.

We read about Vietnam could be a spot for Malaria & Dengue fever, not wanting to take a big risk, he went for the pills. I brought a spray. One night where we stayed in Can Tho (a city near the Mekong river), our tour guide had casually remarked about the existence of Dengue fever. That night we had a non-aircon room and he almost freaked out, worrying that he would get bitten that night. I wanted to laugh, but he was so so so paranoid about stuff like that. When our tour guide finally said the mosquitoes only come at dusk or dawn and mostly at the river/village area, H then let his guard down.

At many times, H was so obsessed with what he wanted to buy on the trip. He wanted to find them, so he was dying at every chance he could to find some shopping venues. When we did sightseeing, he didn't show the same enthusiasm. At one point, I was so pissed and I told him to go to where he wanted instead of following me around to visit Temples in Chinatown. Ya know what he said? "Singapore has all these temples, they are the same, why do you want to come here to see them!" So shallow and narrow-minded comment, unbelievable!!

The most hideous thing he ever said, was that Singaporean women are stupid which is why local men went for Vietnamese women. The truth is that these local men (exactly like him) are incapable of keeping one by their side, these local men are MCP and unable to keep up with our higher standards. They have only small penises and small brains - Sorry if this offends you, but this is meant for men who looks down on their own (country's) women. SHAME ON YOU!

I realized even more that an university education doesn't make one a better person. In fact, H who was or still is on NUS's Dean list, so what??? Does that mean you're more successful, much kinder or even a more sympathetic person. Unfortunately not, in this case. He's boastful, shallow, narrow-minded, MCP and even though he might be intelligent but his EQ is barely passable.

I found my man, and he's white ;)

Should I also add that his blue eyes sparkle when he's turned on! Before you think too far off, my man is my phone. He's a white K550i (Sony Ercisson). Keypad lit up in blue when in use :) I suppose you like my above description ;) Ok, here's how it looks like.

Having searched high & low for months, done research and price surveying... it only came to me yesterday that "Yes, I think he's the one." A lot of times while I'm deciding on the phone, I chanced upon similiarities between changing phones and changing boyfriends.

He's my 4th man. K550i. The 1st is a 2nd hand (waterbottle lookalike) Nokia 6110 if I remember right. I saved and saved, and managed to get it at about S$150. It was one of the best at that time, and I was extremely pleased. Not long after, I refurnished it. The front houses a transparent orange to green gradient cover. When it rang, it totally resembled a "chow ah lian" phone in that 'era'. The whole phone lit up with running lits and was an incredibly loud toy!

It later died, like most phones, it started off with weakening battery. Even a 2nd battery didn't work. My 2nd man, Samsung Egeo, came into view. Still one of my favourites, he's a LADIES' man -- a ladies phone :) It not only remembers your menstrual cycle, it can also calculates calories burnt. Problems arised since I lost his antenna, and I never seem to get my SMS-es. His time was then up... Today he still somehow works (a good backup or holiday phone) though he's quite out of trend. No color, pixels, camera doesn't exist...

The 3rd man, Sharp GX 15, is a pretty long lasting one. He has been with me 3 years and I wouldn't have changed should he work fine. But in recent months, he has deteriorated from bad to worse and now worse to worst. A full battery doesn't even last half a day! Got him in London, and since there's no Sharp mobile locally, I reckon I should rather invest the money than spending it to import the battery from Japan :(

So this is how my 4th man came about...

So you see, I wouldn't change my phone/man until something serious or threatening has occured. My best mate recently lost her mobile and guess what? She bought exactly the same model back. I deduce how sentimental she is and probably the new beau she is looking for is very so often somehow identical to the previous one. Another guy friend changes his mobile every so often. However, him being a man, I guess it's not applicable to take women as phones. Guys should be more IT savvy and knowledgeable about new gadgets, isn't it!

There are those holding on to the same phone for years. Perhaps they are reluctant to accept changes, or could be one of the contented people around... or are they just loyal? Another mate of mine upgrades her mobile plan to get a new phone but happily uses the old one concurrently. While they can be devoted lover, they might still be keeping their options open?? New one are welcome ;) For those whose phone is one of the latest and dying for the next trendy one, STOP BEING GREEDY!

Enough of my analysis - changing phones vs dating men...

My purchase @ iPosh was such a pleasant experience. A tiny cosy shop with ultra-personal service. It turned out they sold the last white K550i before I arrived (I did email to ask!!). I didn't fancy the black, so to make a customer happy, the boss (I think he is) had to pick one up from another location. Reasonable price, excellent service (with no air), I definitely recommend it! Update: BTW, please read about my complaint about iPosh thereafter, I'm very unhappy with their no exchange policy, when they sold me a faulty equipment/phone.

Mambo frill & thrill

$22 cab fare. It sometimes sucks to live faraway from town you know, but I still prefer the peace and quiet outside it. No chaos.
8 hours sleep thereafter with my contact lens. God, I even forgot about these, even though I wasn't anything near drunk!
At least 5 beautiful ladies, 2 gays, 3 boys. I like the gay boys, they take such good care of us :))))
Teochew porridge supper :D~
TOTALLY WORTH IT.

2 drunkards came up to me. They are actually friends but took turns since one of them failed to get my number, handed me a card which I deliberately dropped it somewhere. Touchers, I didn't like them AT ALL! And they went on to terrorize the ladies in our group!! ARGgghhhhhhhhh... idiots.

It's not the first time I met men in a club but it is the first that I get so many of them the same night, it is hard to have fun with these "things" around. It doesn't make ME feel good when a stranger comes up and asks for my number. I take it as a hint that either this man is desperate for a date or for sex. And not surprisingly, the most beautiful thing said to me last night actually came from a gay... Such a sweetie! He even helped me to get away from the idiot!

Thee men I know

I want to quote these from a forwarded email I received, just because it totally perfectly describes someone whom I know of that zodiac sign. It might not be applicable to all, but somehow this one paragraph just fits!

Mr. Cancer
The most sensitive man who can not stand rejection. He could be very funny, very quiet, suddenly very sad. Living with him could be very unexpected, for you will not know what is his next mood. Spending money is part of his good image, so he will be happy to spend money to take you out to a very expensive restaurant or buy a jewelery for you. He loves his mother, so try to be his mother favorite, but do not act like his mother! *yuckss... be his mummy's fav! and a mummy boy*

Mr. Leo
He can work hard like a mad dog, and sometimes can be lazy like a sleepy cat. When he works, he is very serious. When he parties, he can be a party animal. If he ask you out, you will sure have a fun and jolly time. Beauty is always in the eyes of the lion. *mmmm... so true, every single pretty woman he'll not miss* You have to be dignified to walk with the lion king. Your looks is part of his image and ego and he is very proud about it too. He likes to talk and not knowing that he likes to talk about himself.

Mr. Virgo
He will spend money carefully and spent it worthwhile. He will only be extravagant for his personnel pleasure. If he does not care about you, he will not even spent a dime to call you locally. Long distant special low rate call is also out of the question. *such a miser* The more he see faults in others, the less he wants people to see his. If you want him to change his faults, try to tell him gently or he could take it as an insult. A real two "P" , picky and perfectionist Zodiac.

Mr. Scorpio
He is sensitive and easily hurt and always feels lonely. He does not trust anyone but himself. Sounding so negative, but he has an amazingly charisma. He does not like people who never try to help themselves before asking other people for favors. He is the type of guy who mostly achieved his goal in life. He can not retreat or rest for long, for he thinks life has more questions and more answers to be searched. He is happy to know he is a complex figure. You may say something that you already forgotten, but he will remember every words. *sounds like you a-not, siong papa?*

It was a bad day, for the pocket too

The local men just irk me... *where can I find the puke icon*

Okay. I know this is being very subjective of me, and I don't mean all of you out there. Yeah, again I succumbed to the temptation of SALE. I feel very sorry for myself, in fact, for my pocket. Yes, I know. You go thinking,"What! Again?"

At the Bodyshop Sale yesterday, there was a massive kiasu crowd at lunch time. I admit I'm one of them but more of the calm one, not rushing and pushing. It was the first day and all the good deals were there. So found the things I wanted, queued behind hundreds of people (about 20 minutes I reckon), the guy in front started chatting to me. Being polite, I just continued the conversation till we reached the end of the Q. And guess what... he's another of the ungentlemanly, miserly, indecisive and kiasu Singaporean men. Today, out of another itch, I went to take a second look (and helped a friend to look out for the eye shimmer I got). There I saw him again, this time with 2 female colleagues and saw him "bargaining" with the sales person. OMG, this is a sale... you get what you pay for and there I saw this "cheapo" man, whining about the $5 deal (what we got yesterday) which is already sold out by today.

God's sake, I feel very disappointed with the local men I met. Still... my friend was consoling me, the good ones are just outside your social circle... mmm... I'll believe her for once.


Just another additional list (I know, hopeless... and I better fuckin' stop this before I go HK):
15. Bsyi Sale (1 skirt) - approx $15
16. Bodyshop Sale (Eye shimmer cubes, 5 in 1 cleanser set) - approx $15
17. This Fashion Sale (1 legging) - approx $6
18. Diva Sale (1 necklace, 1 pair of earrings, 1 ring) - approx $11 (new add-on as on 02/04/07)

Out of nowhere, it rains...

It hasn't rained for a while... and it just did today. The haze situation is improving and I hope it doesn't come back any sooner. I miss that fresher air and not walking amidst the island of mist/fog. The second last of Fab 4 has since left, yet I have been feeling indifferent. I miss her laughter and sometimes her screaming into my ear (on the phone) but I'm sure I'll see her again soon - maybe next year. But hey I spoke to her on MSN Voice. The only one left in Singapore, me (like Joy the last time), but strangely I'm not feeling too lonely, but quite so comfortable in my own space. I'm not feeling particularly inspired to write today, so I'll just do my normal rambling or even rumblings (realized this is more towards dissatisfaction). 3 days ago, my sister woke up on the wrong side of the bed and blew her top, almost like insanity. She reminded me of the time my mum lost her cool, they are too similar... But all is over, and the following day she tried to make peace.

My little sister has the radio on too often, so and something caught my ears. It is said that "A study/research or a survey has showed that blue-eyed men married to partners whom are not blue-eyed are more likely to cheat", my sister blamed it on their recessive genes. They do want to have blue-eyed babies, don't they? Aha, anyway do you believe it? Girls with blue-eyed partners, beware... However, I think if a man wants to cheat, no matter what nationality, what eye color, what race, what age he is... he will. Enough, when will I be taking the plane again?

Problematic men

I feel like pulling his hair... not mine!! When a man comes and talks to you about his pathetic problems, I thought I am supposed to listen and be supportive. I should refrain from giving advices or suggestions because they are not going to be appreciative of them... or they would want to prove themselves they are able to tackle it. So why are they complaining, obviously they need a listening ear, right? I listened... I tried to say something positive and kept it light-hearted... instead all I got was negative and offensive remarks. Why should I deserve them, you a****** Glyn! Yes, I am being optimistic but I don't see it as a sad thing, being a realist doesn't mean I have to be as pessimistic as you are - then why the hell are you telling me your problems?? Get support?? Or get someone to feel as miserable as you are. I don't think my life needs men like these...

One of a kind Singaporean guy

I am not going to penalize all the men in Singapore, but just pinpointing to this 'friend' of mine. Actually 'friend' in fact is too nice a word to be used on him, I rather call him an acquaintance... Or in fact, not knowing him might have made my life easier.

It is disappointing to meet or know someone from home whom can be such tactless and selfish. Hey men, are you all like this, or hey Singaporean men, or even just you??

I have had this holiday-making friend right here in London. The kind of man whom keeps the good things to himself, comes chat with you with his fucked up problem about girls, only wants to hang out if he's bored to death and can't think of anything else to occupy himself, gets green with envy when you share nice things with him... I still recall trying to send him job links and tell him all the temporary jobs I was applying, so he could get his ass on something and earn some pathetic bucks. But he was all the while secretly keeping those he had to himself - such a stinking bastard! When he has no need to speak to you, he will brush you off with his tactless remarks.

He has to go to hell... And I hope he will. *Don't never return to Singapore and disgrace the male population!!* Right now, off my list, lesser a pest, my life will be better.