Ich bin muede :~(

I have been happy for the longest time I know... till today. Out of a sudden, I feel like the battery that has lost all its energy, the bird that has got tired of flying, the hungry cat that has stopped hunting for food, the rainy day that has no rainbow afterwards and most importantly a human who has got tired of being happy. Can it even happen? Tired of being happy? Tired of being optimistic, positive, hopeful, grateful... I think it can. I feel helpless, lost and exhausted. I feel as if I have cycled through another 4 hours of hell, I feel as though not waking up tomorrow morning doesn't make a difference anymore because there is nothing to look forward to. I suddenly seem to have lost my goals, my dreams, my ambitions... and slowly my loved ones, my friends... my life. I want to blame GOD for not helping me, but I know it isn't HIS fault. I want to blame someone for causing me pain, but it's not anyone's fault. I want to blame somebody but there is nobody. I am sick of being positive and it's not going anywhere. I am sick of waiting, I am sick of things that are not within my control, I am sick of depending on luck. I want to hide, I want to cry, I want to be alone. Can you even hear me? Can you even feel it? Can you know it but pretend not to? Can you tell me life is always playing tricks on us? Can you not tell me life isn't always fair?